More wordless here, here, and of course here.
Do You Remember??
3 hours ago
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Saturday, March 6, 2010
A Blooming Success
I have this friend that lives inside my computer. Her name is Bonnie and she used to be an angry infertile. Now she is asking I Can Haz Bebe? After living the nightmare version of the movie Juno, she and her husband are now dropping buttloads of cash to adopt internationally. The problem? They don't have buttloads of cash. So they are having fundraisers! Bonnie is very proactive and motivated (not to mention TALENTED) so she even has a raffle going on to help raise funds. Great loot being given away!
My favorite fundraiser is the flowers. Spring is just around the corner and you can order some bulbs to plant in the ground or some dwarf blueberry bushes that will bare fruit next year. If coffee is your thing, she's got that too. You may already be following her story but if you aren't please do hop on over and give her some encouragement. I'd love to see this adoption journey be a blooming success.
My favorite fundraiser is the flowers. Spring is just around the corner and you can order some bulbs to plant in the ground or some dwarf blueberry bushes that will bare fruit next year. If coffee is your thing, she's got that too. You may already be following her story but if you aren't please do hop on over and give her some encouragement. I'd love to see this adoption journey be a blooming success.
Friday, March 5, 2010
To Leash or Not To Leash
To leash or not to leash, that is the question. Not dogs, children. It's a controversial topic and I'm aware that people have very strong opinions about the subject. As a matter of fact, before parenting BabyBoy, I had always been of the Anti Child Leash Camp. Now though, I'm reconsidering. Specifically, I'm looking to purchase the Jeep 3 in 1 Backpack Harness. Some of the reviews mention that it rubs the child's neck raw, so perhaps one of those that looks like an animal
would be better?
I have parented 4 separate two year old children and have provided care for many others. I'm aware of typical development and behaviors for a toddler. BabyBoy is a little more impulsive, okay a lot more impulsive, and he explodes into angry abusive outburst. He is also very clever and active. He can scale balcony railing in a matter of seconds. He can unlock three locks on a hotel room door and get down to a lower floor in the time it takes me to start the bath water for another child. He can leap into traffic in the amount of time it takes me to bend down to tie his shoe. No amount of stern voice, warning, time outs, restrictions, redirecting, taking away toys faze him. He is defiant and he will figure out a way to accomplish whatever it is he wants. Hence the reason I'm considering buying a child leash.
We go to the zoo and the Thomas the Train event every year and both places are safe for him to run freely. Cool. We also go to the aquarium where it's not okay for him to push others out of his way, run ahead to where I can't see him, and climb on the railing. Same with Disney where it's just not safe for him to run out of my eye sight, or to run out of the tram door just as it is closing and taking off with me and the other kids on board. He's too big for a sling and I have to carry BabyGirl in it anyway. We have a single stroller and are looking at purchasing a double or triple
stroller
to help in these instances. But you may remember how BabyBoy jumped in the pool not once, not twice, but three times without an adult this summer while on vacation. All three times I was in the process of walking in the gate while carrying a ton of stuff, or putting it down so that I could get in the water before the kids, and every time he would run full speed ahead of me and jump into the pool. This past summer he was only one year old. He can't swim! Completely fearless.
Before parenting BabyBoy, I would have clucked my tongue and shook my head like a good southern girl and probably made some remark about the child's behavior reflecting the adult's poor parenting skills. I would have been judgmental. I guess this is payback, a reality check of sorts, a chance to sample some humble pie.
To leash or not to leash, what do you think?
would be better?I have parented 4 separate two year old children and have provided care for many others. I'm aware of typical development and behaviors for a toddler. BabyBoy is a little more impulsive, okay a lot more impulsive, and he explodes into angry abusive outburst. He is also very clever and active. He can scale balcony railing in a matter of seconds. He can unlock three locks on a hotel room door and get down to a lower floor in the time it takes me to start the bath water for another child. He can leap into traffic in the amount of time it takes me to bend down to tie his shoe. No amount of stern voice, warning, time outs, restrictions, redirecting, taking away toys faze him. He is defiant and he will figure out a way to accomplish whatever it is he wants. Hence the reason I'm considering buying a child leash.
We go to the zoo and the Thomas the Train event every year and both places are safe for him to run freely. Cool. We also go to the aquarium where it's not okay for him to push others out of his way, run ahead to where I can't see him, and climb on the railing. Same with Disney where it's just not safe for him to run out of my eye sight, or to run out of the tram door just as it is closing and taking off with me and the other kids on board. He's too big for a sling and I have to carry BabyGirl in it anyway. We have a single stroller and are looking at purchasing a double or triple
stroller to help in these instances. But you may remember how BabyBoy jumped in the pool not once, not twice, but three times without an adult this summer while on vacation. All three times I was in the process of walking in the gate while carrying a ton of stuff, or putting it down so that I could get in the water before the kids, and every time he would run full speed ahead of me and jump into the pool. This past summer he was only one year old. He can't swim! Completely fearless.Before parenting BabyBoy, I would have clucked my tongue and shook my head like a good southern girl and probably made some remark about the child's behavior reflecting the adult's poor parenting skills. I would have been judgmental. I guess this is payback, a reality check of sorts, a chance to sample some humble pie.
To leash or not to leash, what do you think?
Thursday, March 4, 2010
A little ray of sunshine
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Birth Parent Drama
Internally I flip flop about contact with the Birth Parents, but externally I stick to my guns about remaining open. Obviously the situation isn't perfect. They kept taking and I kept giving. They kept violating boundaries that I tried to set, and I suppose I let them. Yes, the whole thing was difficult for everyone involved, but damnit I wanted it to work.
A few weeks ago the Birth Dad said he had to walk away but to let Birth Mom keep seeing the kids. Then Birth Dad proceeded to ask me for money, transportation, food, etc. I complied. Birth Mom thought she was pregnant so I took her to the OBGYN and Birth Dad went along. He was adamant about not wanting to visit with the kids but they were sitting right next to him in the vehicle. So he wore his Ipod and turned it loud enough to drown out the van's radio. He also muttered obscenities and said things about not letting anyone have any more of his kids. For the first time since meeting them two years ago, I was physically afraid of him. He was angry and pushed Birth Mom. Birth Dad was verbally combative with me. I hated that the kids were witnessing it. Then when I took them home, Birth Dad kept calling BabyBoy "son" and telling him "daddy loves you". I was too scared to say anything. So it was decided that we wouldn't have any more visits unless Darwin could also attend. Birth Dad doesn't come to visits when Darwin arrives with me to pick them up.
One day when I was for sure going to be able to make the drive to take her food and gas money to get back to the OBGYN again, because again she thought she was pregnant, it snowed. I refused to go down our mountain, up her mountain, and then the same in reverse just to take her $20 and some soup. I told her I would put the money in the mail since the postal system is braver than I.
Then, a horrible stomach virus swept through our household, one person at a time, ensuring that someone was sick every single day for a week. During this time Birth Mom wanted me to bring her food and money. I meant to but was busy vomiting, ass pissing, or cleaning up someone else's vomit and ass piss. And because I was so busy doing this, I forgot to put a twenty in the mail. So Birth Mom didn't go to her OBGYN appointment because I didn't give her gas money. Basically if she gets pregnant now, it's all my fault because she was going to get the BC shot if she wasn't already preggers. For the record, I felt bad about not following through. I hate when I forget something. I typically write everything down so that I don't forget, but being sick just took a lot out of us all and I fucked up.
The Daughter had some eye issues and while at the ophthalmologist the BirthParents called and text'd several times. Then we went to PreOp where they called and texted some more. They knew we had all been sick and that the kids went to my parents while I was in the thick of the virus myself. They knew we had that doctor appointment in another city. They knew my parents were watching the other kids that day. But they called. And texted. And I got frustrated. So when we got to the parking lot I called them back and told them how I felt about a lot of stuff. I should mention that Birth Mom is back to working and received a paycheck the same day she skipped out on her OBGYN appointment. She claimed that she didn't have enough money left over from her paycheck to pay someone gas money to take her to the doctor. But they turned their phone back on and bought cigarettes and other things of importance to them. I knew that I shouldn't have told her how I really felt. I knew it made them mad. I knew they would lash out. I just didn't expect they would be so vicious and unstable.
The next day BirthMom asked for some food. I said I would bring her the food that I had already purchased for them. She called back saying she would meet me in a city near me. Then she called and said she could just come here! I said I was already on my way to neutral city. She said they were going there with a neighbor who was going for a job interview. Then turned out his interview was the next day. Then turned out he was promised that I would give him gas money for bringing them to meet me. I was just going to go to their place ... they were manipulating the situation. I told them I couldn't do a visit but they wanted a visit anyway. They got in the van with the kids. I was forced to do a short visit. Everyone was friendly and I thought we parted on good terms. Except then they tried to follow me and I had to evade via a long route through the boondocks before going home.
The day after that while BirthMom was away, BirthDad sent a text saying not only is he going to walk away but now he is making BirthMom walk away too. He said he doesn't know why BirthMom keeps asking me for things (he asks as much as she does!) but that he is putting a stop to it BY GETTING A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST ME. He told me that I better change my cell and home number so BirthMom can't contact me. He said if I try to contact them, go to the fast food location where BirthMom works, or send them mail that he will have me arrested. I didn't reply to the text right away because we were having BabyBoy's birthday party. When I did reply BirthMom had no idea what was going on, so I forwarded her his text.
She took up for him saying he is depressed. He is sad about loosing his mom and uncle all in the past couple of years. He is worried about their living situation and not being able to get anyone to help him get to a job (I've given him the info about 2 separate interviews, neither of which he attended). Besides, he thinks that I don't want them to see the kids because the last couple of things have fallen through. They seemed to have forgotten about the day before. They also seemed to forget about all the other things we've done for them and all the other twice weekly visits we've had. But it is my fault and that's why he threatened me with a restraining order ... because he thought I didn't want him to see the kids. The kids I just let him see the day before. So then they asked for a visit and I said I would only come if they promised not to have me arrested for showing up in violation of this alleged restraining order.
Next day BirthDad texts me saying he is going to call and report me to CPS for leaving his kids with people that do drugs just because I've got the shits. I reply that my parents don't do drugs. He calls me a liar. I explain, again, about my childhood and how my parents aren't like that anymore and haven't been since the 80s. He says he will call CPS and report me over and over until HIS KIDS are moved. He says he knows I've had a kid taken from me before. I replied that I have not but that he is welcomed to call CPS as they know all about my childhood and are all up in our business now as well. He goes on and on with threats. I called CPS and my lawyer.
Silence for two days.
Then BirthDad sent a text LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED. He basically said he was putting the kids on his insurance because he starts work the following week. And BirthMom sent a text saying they were talking about seeing the kids. She told me again that he got a job and how excited they were. Then they called and called and called. They called the cell. They called the house. Over and over and over. Both my lawyer and CPS advised me to not answer and not reply, so I didn't.
I understand that the situation was hard emotionally on the birthparents, but it didn't have to go down like this. They could have asked me to stop sending updates and setting up visits without so much drama. Sad situation. I did tell them how I will do my best to raise the kids well and to let them know how much BirthParents love and care for them. I also said that if they change their minds in the future and figure out a way to be okay with visits, that I will be open to that. Maybe they just need time to sort it all out. Or maybe she is pregnant and they wanted to sever contact with me so they could leave the state untraced and keep one of their kids. I don't know, but I was really hoping for an open relationship for the kids sake though I did wonder at times if it was really in their best interest. Now the decision has been made. By them.
A few weeks ago the Birth Dad said he had to walk away but to let Birth Mom keep seeing the kids. Then Birth Dad proceeded to ask me for money, transportation, food, etc. I complied. Birth Mom thought she was pregnant so I took her to the OBGYN and Birth Dad went along. He was adamant about not wanting to visit with the kids but they were sitting right next to him in the vehicle. So he wore his Ipod and turned it loud enough to drown out the van's radio. He also muttered obscenities and said things about not letting anyone have any more of his kids. For the first time since meeting them two years ago, I was physically afraid of him. He was angry and pushed Birth Mom. Birth Dad was verbally combative with me. I hated that the kids were witnessing it. Then when I took them home, Birth Dad kept calling BabyBoy "son" and telling him "daddy loves you". I was too scared to say anything. So it was decided that we wouldn't have any more visits unless Darwin could also attend. Birth Dad doesn't come to visits when Darwin arrives with me to pick them up.
One day when I was for sure going to be able to make the drive to take her food and gas money to get back to the OBGYN again, because again she thought she was pregnant, it snowed. I refused to go down our mountain, up her mountain, and then the same in reverse just to take her $20 and some soup. I told her I would put the money in the mail since the postal system is braver than I.
Then, a horrible stomach virus swept through our household, one person at a time, ensuring that someone was sick every single day for a week. During this time Birth Mom wanted me to bring her food and money. I meant to but was busy vomiting, ass pissing, or cleaning up someone else's vomit and ass piss. And because I was so busy doing this, I forgot to put a twenty in the mail. So Birth Mom didn't go to her OBGYN appointment because I didn't give her gas money. Basically if she gets pregnant now, it's all my fault because she was going to get the BC shot if she wasn't already preggers. For the record, I felt bad about not following through. I hate when I forget something. I typically write everything down so that I don't forget, but being sick just took a lot out of us all and I fucked up.
The Daughter had some eye issues and while at the ophthalmologist the BirthParents called and text'd several times. Then we went to PreOp where they called and texted some more. They knew we had all been sick and that the kids went to my parents while I was in the thick of the virus myself. They knew we had that doctor appointment in another city. They knew my parents were watching the other kids that day. But they called. And texted. And I got frustrated. So when we got to the parking lot I called them back and told them how I felt about a lot of stuff. I should mention that Birth Mom is back to working and received a paycheck the same day she skipped out on her OBGYN appointment. She claimed that she didn't have enough money left over from her paycheck to pay someone gas money to take her to the doctor. But they turned their phone back on and bought cigarettes and other things of importance to them. I knew that I shouldn't have told her how I really felt. I knew it made them mad. I knew they would lash out. I just didn't expect they would be so vicious and unstable.
The next day BirthMom asked for some food. I said I would bring her the food that I had already purchased for them. She called back saying she would meet me in a city near me. Then she called and said she could just come here! I said I was already on my way to neutral city. She said they were going there with a neighbor who was going for a job interview. Then turned out his interview was the next day. Then turned out he was promised that I would give him gas money for bringing them to meet me. I was just going to go to their place ... they were manipulating the situation. I told them I couldn't do a visit but they wanted a visit anyway. They got in the van with the kids. I was forced to do a short visit. Everyone was friendly and I thought we parted on good terms. Except then they tried to follow me and I had to evade via a long route through the boondocks before going home.
The day after that while BirthMom was away, BirthDad sent a text saying not only is he going to walk away but now he is making BirthMom walk away too. He said he doesn't know why BirthMom keeps asking me for things (he asks as much as she does!) but that he is putting a stop to it BY GETTING A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST ME. He told me that I better change my cell and home number so BirthMom can't contact me. He said if I try to contact them, go to the fast food location where BirthMom works, or send them mail that he will have me arrested. I didn't reply to the text right away because we were having BabyBoy's birthday party. When I did reply BirthMom had no idea what was going on, so I forwarded her his text.
She took up for him saying he is depressed. He is sad about loosing his mom and uncle all in the past couple of years. He is worried about their living situation and not being able to get anyone to help him get to a job (I've given him the info about 2 separate interviews, neither of which he attended). Besides, he thinks that I don't want them to see the kids because the last couple of things have fallen through. They seemed to have forgotten about the day before. They also seemed to forget about all the other things we've done for them and all the other twice weekly visits we've had. But it is my fault and that's why he threatened me with a restraining order ... because he thought I didn't want him to see the kids. The kids I just let him see the day before. So then they asked for a visit and I said I would only come if they promised not to have me arrested for showing up in violation of this alleged restraining order.
Next day BirthDad texts me saying he is going to call and report me to CPS for leaving his kids with people that do drugs just because I've got the shits. I reply that my parents don't do drugs. He calls me a liar. I explain, again, about my childhood and how my parents aren't like that anymore and haven't been since the 80s. He says he will call CPS and report me over and over until HIS KIDS are moved. He says he knows I've had a kid taken from me before. I replied that I have not but that he is welcomed to call CPS as they know all about my childhood and are all up in our business now as well. He goes on and on with threats. I called CPS and my lawyer.
Silence for two days.
Then BirthDad sent a text LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED. He basically said he was putting the kids on his insurance because he starts work the following week. And BirthMom sent a text saying they were talking about seeing the kids. She told me again that he got a job and how excited they were. Then they called and called and called. They called the cell. They called the house. Over and over and over. Both my lawyer and CPS advised me to not answer and not reply, so I didn't.
I understand that the situation was hard emotionally on the birthparents, but it didn't have to go down like this. They could have asked me to stop sending updates and setting up visits without so much drama. Sad situation. I did tell them how I will do my best to raise the kids well and to let them know how much BirthParents love and care for them. I also said that if they change their minds in the future and figure out a way to be okay with visits, that I will be open to that. Maybe they just need time to sort it all out. Or maybe she is pregnant and they wanted to sever contact with me so they could leave the state untraced and keep one of their kids. I don't know, but I was really hoping for an open relationship for the kids sake though I did wonder at times if it was really in their best interest. Now the decision has been made. By them.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
My Precious
I feel like Smeagal right now stroking my computer saying My Preeeeecious. We put the computer in the shop. It was slow as molasses. Things in quarantine kept replicating into different places. I thought quarantine meant they couldn't do that, but apparently they can. So I've been internet-less for a whole week. Pure torture.
Darwin got me a laptop for Christmas, but it doesn't have a hickey for dialup and that's all we can get out here in the sticks. It's useless. Used to I would go sit at the library and relish in fast page loads, but now I've got a 2 year old and a 2 month old and neither are library-friendly. Woe is me, right? LOL
The Daughter came out of surgery with a swollen black eye, but within a few hours was able to see out of it again. The next day she was very dizzy and weak so I kept her home from school even though she didn't have a doctor's excuse. That night she began vomiting. Just hours before she got sick, I said to Childhood Frienemy that The Daughter was the only person in our household that hadn't caught the stomach virus "knock on wood". Guess I should've knocked harder. She was down for the count the rest of the week. Missed more school.
I had some foster parent stuff that was fun and interesting. There are some people from the foster/adoptive parenting blogosphere that I have met and some I will soon be meeting. It is weird to meet people and know more about them than they realize, but I don't feel I can say "I read your blog" because then they'll ask if I blog and I can't have my two worlds colliding.
BirthParent drama out the wazoo. It will get its own post soon.
BabyGirl's adoption is finalized!
BabyBoy's new birth certificate came in the mail recently. Very odd to see our names listed as the birth parents. The OBGYN listed is BirthMom's, not mine. Just seems so wrong. I think there should be a "birth certificate" and then an "adoption certificate".
We got another call for a placement but I asked to be removed from the list until Darwin leaves. He is already working overtime and the kids need to spend time with him. A year apart is a long time for little kids. Then, everything changes.
My parents both got the stomach virus, one week apart.
I put up the heart motif for Valentine's Day / February but will be changing it back soon. Love, love, LOVE Lena Toews designs but installing the template erased everything, links and all, and I hate having to go back and redo everything. Mainly because I can't remember how to take the black lines from around the pictures. I can't remember how to widen the middle area where you write. And with dial up it takes forever and a day to find the info online and then hunt and peck on the keyboard until I fix it all. Doesn't help that I'm computer stupid. I think I'll try ShabbyBlogs backgrounds next and then probably just bite the bullet and have someone design what I really want. I have it all figured out in my head but can't draw for shit and even if I could, I wouldn't have the slightest idea how to make that into a blog design. But anyway, changes coming soon.
45 day menstrual cycles suck.
It snowed again.
And that ends my rambling. For now.
Darwin got me a laptop for Christmas, but it doesn't have a hickey for dialup and that's all we can get out here in the sticks. It's useless. Used to I would go sit at the library and relish in fast page loads, but now I've got a 2 year old and a 2 month old and neither are library-friendly. Woe is me, right? LOL
The Daughter came out of surgery with a swollen black eye, but within a few hours was able to see out of it again. The next day she was very dizzy and weak so I kept her home from school even though she didn't have a doctor's excuse. That night she began vomiting. Just hours before she got sick, I said to Childhood Frienemy that The Daughter was the only person in our household that hadn't caught the stomach virus "knock on wood". Guess I should've knocked harder. She was down for the count the rest of the week. Missed more school.
I had some foster parent stuff that was fun and interesting. There are some people from the foster/adoptive parenting blogosphere that I have met and some I will soon be meeting. It is weird to meet people and know more about them than they realize, but I don't feel I can say "I read your blog" because then they'll ask if I blog and I can't have my two worlds colliding.
BirthParent drama out the wazoo. It will get its own post soon.
BabyGirl's adoption is finalized!
BabyBoy's new birth certificate came in the mail recently. Very odd to see our names listed as the birth parents. The OBGYN listed is BirthMom's, not mine. Just seems so wrong. I think there should be a "birth certificate" and then an "adoption certificate".
We got another call for a placement but I asked to be removed from the list until Darwin leaves. He is already working overtime and the kids need to spend time with him. A year apart is a long time for little kids. Then, everything changes.
My parents both got the stomach virus, one week apart.
I put up the heart motif for Valentine's Day / February but will be changing it back soon. Love, love, LOVE Lena Toews designs but installing the template erased everything, links and all, and I hate having to go back and redo everything. Mainly because I can't remember how to take the black lines from around the pictures. I can't remember how to widen the middle area where you write. And with dial up it takes forever and a day to find the info online and then hunt and peck on the keyboard until I fix it all. Doesn't help that I'm computer stupid. I think I'll try ShabbyBlogs backgrounds next and then probably just bite the bullet and have someone design what I really want. I have it all figured out in my head but can't draw for shit and even if I could, I wouldn't have the slightest idea how to make that into a blog design. But anyway, changes coming soon.
45 day menstrual cycles suck.
It snowed again.
And that ends my rambling. For now.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
More surgery for The Daughter
She's going under general anesthesia for the second time in two months time. Nervous. This time on her eye lid near her tear duct. Scary.
In Kindergarten The Daughter started having eye issues. First I think was pink eye, then a sty, but it may have been in reverse order. I'd have to look it up to be for sure and I'm too lazy to do that. The red lump on her lower lid came and went every couple of months. Inside would be red and sometimes have white bumps. I was worried about it and thought it was a fever blister in her eye but her pediatrician adamantly denied anyone could get fever blisters in the eye. So, lacking the MD beside my name, I went with his words and just fretted over her eye in private. A year later and it was getting worse so I consulted Dr Google. Turns out fever blisters in the eye CAN happen so I called the pediatrician's nurse for a referral to an ophthalmologist. She actually laughed at me for thinking anyone could get a fever blister in the eye. LAUGHED. But she gave me the name and number of an ophthalmologist and I called them. Earliest they could see The Daughter was May ... until I told them what I suspected was wrong ... they saw her the next day. Turns out eye doctors actually realize the seriousness of shit going on in and around the eye. You know, because it affects things like sight.
Because they squeezed us in so quickly, I didn't complain when we waited in one waiting room for 2 1/2 hours and in another for 1 1/2 hours. I didn't complain when we had to pay out of pocket for an eye exam (with eye chart - like for getting glasses) before ever seeing the doctor. I didn't complain when the doctor spent all of 3 minutes in the room with us before diagnosing The Daughter with a chalazion and scheduling surgery. I didn't complain when we then had to drive to another location for blood work and preop stuff. I didn't complain when the anesthesiologist, who is ex Navy, had no bedside manner with little kids. But, I did draw the line when a woman whose name tag said "administrator" took The Daughter's temp and listened to her chest and proclaimed The Daughter needed to head straight to the ER because she had bronchitis. WTF lady? So we had to get an RN to confirm and she said the same. I wasn't convinced. The Daughter was hot because she was dressed for the 26 degree weather of that morning and it was then 60 degrees that afternoon. She was snotty because she was crying from having her finger pricked and being told every single gory detail of her procedure thanks to Mr ExNavy's lack of kid skills. But she felt fine and I wasn't about to call an ambulance for a healthy child with a slightly elevated temp and a booger in her nose. They insisted we head straight over to the pediatricians office. Maybe they're all in cahoots together to see how many copays they can possibly get from one person in one day (three from us, as it turns out). The Ped wasn't taking any more patients for the day, but we could drive the 40 miles back there the next day, miss more school, and have them label us loco for coming in as a sick patient when there are no sick symptoms. We declined. She's fine. I've been checking her temp obsessively and it's a completely normal 98.6 and she's booger free.
As long as Ms Administrator and her friend the RN aren't involved in The Daughter's surgery, it'll be okay. Though if they scrub in, I might just have to pull the plug and go elsewhere.
I'm glad she doesn't have a fever blister in her eye. Very glad. But I also wish that her Ped wasn't so dismissive over the past year so that we could have gotten her treatment for the chalazion sooner. Like when in office treatment would have remedied the situation instead of needing a scalpel to cut out scar tissue. Mom guilt is so fun. Not.
Please send good thoughts to her today. She is a brave 6 year old, but understandably worried.
In Kindergarten The Daughter started having eye issues. First I think was pink eye, then a sty, but it may have been in reverse order. I'd have to look it up to be for sure and I'm too lazy to do that. The red lump on her lower lid came and went every couple of months. Inside would be red and sometimes have white bumps. I was worried about it and thought it was a fever blister in her eye but her pediatrician adamantly denied anyone could get fever blisters in the eye. So, lacking the MD beside my name, I went with his words and just fretted over her eye in private. A year later and it was getting worse so I consulted Dr Google. Turns out fever blisters in the eye CAN happen so I called the pediatrician's nurse for a referral to an ophthalmologist. She actually laughed at me for thinking anyone could get a fever blister in the eye. LAUGHED. But she gave me the name and number of an ophthalmologist and I called them. Earliest they could see The Daughter was May ... until I told them what I suspected was wrong ... they saw her the next day. Turns out eye doctors actually realize the seriousness of shit going on in and around the eye. You know, because it affects things like sight.
Because they squeezed us in so quickly, I didn't complain when we waited in one waiting room for 2 1/2 hours and in another for 1 1/2 hours. I didn't complain when we had to pay out of pocket for an eye exam (with eye chart - like for getting glasses) before ever seeing the doctor. I didn't complain when the doctor spent all of 3 minutes in the room with us before diagnosing The Daughter with a chalazion and scheduling surgery. I didn't complain when we then had to drive to another location for blood work and preop stuff. I didn't complain when the anesthesiologist, who is ex Navy, had no bedside manner with little kids. But, I did draw the line when a woman whose name tag said "administrator" took The Daughter's temp and listened to her chest and proclaimed The Daughter needed to head straight to the ER because she had bronchitis. WTF lady? So we had to get an RN to confirm and she said the same. I wasn't convinced. The Daughter was hot because she was dressed for the 26 degree weather of that morning and it was then 60 degrees that afternoon. She was snotty because she was crying from having her finger pricked and being told every single gory detail of her procedure thanks to Mr ExNavy's lack of kid skills. But she felt fine and I wasn't about to call an ambulance for a healthy child with a slightly elevated temp and a booger in her nose. They insisted we head straight over to the pediatricians office. Maybe they're all in cahoots together to see how many copays they can possibly get from one person in one day (three from us, as it turns out). The Ped wasn't taking any more patients for the day, but we could drive the 40 miles back there the next day, miss more school, and have them label us loco for coming in as a sick patient when there are no sick symptoms. We declined. She's fine. I've been checking her temp obsessively and it's a completely normal 98.6 and she's booger free.
As long as Ms Administrator and her friend the RN aren't involved in The Daughter's surgery, it'll be okay. Though if they scrub in, I might just have to pull the plug and go elsewhere.
I'm glad she doesn't have a fever blister in her eye. Very glad. But I also wish that her Ped wasn't so dismissive over the past year so that we could have gotten her treatment for the chalazion sooner. Like when in office treatment would have remedied the situation instead of needing a scalpel to cut out scar tissue. Mom guilt is so fun. Not.
Please send good thoughts to her today. She is a brave 6 year old, but understandably worried.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)